Monday, May 9, 2011

Revival !!!

I really dunno if i'll keep at it or not bt i just thot of reviving this dead blog. Everything seems boring and life seems to have stagnated and i feel very lonesome...and i'm just too lazy to find my diary and write down
Dear virtual diary,
how u doin ??? ah....i see...evn you are stuck in some unknow region of space and know what we both have in common...we are both just stagnant...just yesterday was so literally....yesterday as in 8th of may...exams got we went out to party at aahar drunk...ok....i'll write down the rest later...i'm too tired and lazy and disinterested for this,...

Friday, March 5, 2010


I don't know how it started
And i can't believe the end
It wasn't all so different
But yet so out of trend

Some moments I'll always remember
Some moments,I thought we'd always share
Even if you don't care anymore
Even if you aren't there

How "you" and "me" became "we"
How the year became sublime
How "we" became just "me"
And my moments to last a lifetime...

Those moments were so special
Those moments were so fine
How kind of you to forget them!
"Our" moments are now just "mine"

The first time we talked all night
The first time your smile meant more
The first time we walked together
Into the classroom door

The first time I waited for you
For long hours outside your house
Caressing your nervous face
Was your scented hair-like lace

Remember the warm winter evenings
Made warmer by the wait
The indifference in your smile
Each time you were late...

Remember how you trembeled
When we first walked hand in hand
Though it was just a walk in the park
It all felt so grand

Remember the rainy mornings
Made brighter by your "love you"s
And the sleepless windy nights
Made dreamy by your "me too"s

Remember the first time you hugged me
Your heart beating like double bass
And all the times you drugged me
With your addictive kisses

Remember, how i gazed at your face
And you would just look away
And accidentally when our eyes would meet
They'd just stay that way...

Remember when we slow danced
My feet carrying your toes
It was so much more than the wedding dance
Of a couple after their vows...

Remember when we broke up
For the first time I saw you crying
I wiped your tears and hugged you
-It was like i was dying...

You gave me a pseudo life
But it still felt so real
It was all very similar
But you had the better of the deal

It took me a while to realise
That you were no more the same
You'd cried-"never leave me alone"
I believed you- I was so lame

I never walked away
I stood there all through
But you didn't keep your words
The one who walked away- was you...

You were happy in your world
And I had no reason to be there
But when the seasons grew colder
I couldn't refuse to care

But darling, don't you hate me
Coz i won't ever hate you
It was easy for you to move on
But baby, I'm trying too...

But when I lay in my bed in darkness
Looking out of the window-with eyes open ajar
It is for your wishes baby
That I still search for a shooting star...

Monday, June 11, 2007

One Afternoon @ The Red-Light

m The only reason behind starting dis blog is to share dis one experience I had 2day dat changed my approach 2 life.
The day before was one of the hottest dayz in delhi-44 degrees C , and 2day was no better. It was abt 10:20 am nd I was on my way 2 Narayana (iit coaching center).
My shirt nd helmet were soaked in my sweat as I was waitin at the red light at the IIT flyover.
As I looked in my rear view mirror I saw dis very small girl (abt 4 yrs old) wearing a dirty , torn frock , bare feet on the metallic road. I turned back to look at her directly. All the carbon nd hot gases from the exhausts of the neighboring vehicles (not 4m mine, I had turned off the engine :) ) were hitting her face. She was cryin out loud wid her shrill voice “ chai wale , chai wale ” (imagine such a small child calling her frnd as chaiwala…like me calling u guys “padhnewale” instead of ur names ). And dis “chai wala” was jus another 7-8 yr old boy who too was wearing a dirty, torn unbuttoned shirt nd a torn half-pant nd was carrying a hot kettle of tea. The girl was abt 9-10 meters away from the “chai wala “. With all the roaring of the engines nd the horns I could still hear her voice nd maybe – no definitely, evn the “chai wala” heard her bt he didn’t stop and turn back..he kept on walkin his way….poor girl in the scorching sun bare feet on the metallic road..wid ol d hot gases hitting still shouting wid all her might….I just can’t describe how she was speeding up her little steps to reach the “ chai wala” ( nd also due 2 d hot metallic road)..maybe she wanted some water or sumthing…I jus had 3 eclairs in my pocket…dere was still much time for the light to turn green…I called her loudly…she wasn’t far from me…I gave her dose 3 eclairs, merely a matter of 3 rupees for us bt not less dan a delicacy for her..
She said no word of thanks…maybe she knew none…bt d smile on her face was so damn pure…at dat one moment all my problems seemed so small….they just vanished and I realized how I was wasting my life sulking over petty things…when ppl like her were facing life wid a smile.
That day in Narayana dere was a commotion in class bcoz the ACs weren’t working. I know it was a very very bad situation but atleast it was better than the heat on the roads outside….if every1 would’ve made up dere mind to study it was very much possible to study in dat very room. This is the damn problem wid us guys , we r always complaining! (c um complaining abt dis problem rightaway !)

When I reached home dat day I called up a frnd.we tokd 4 a while bt she seemed 2 be upset abt sumthin so she put down d fone. Then trying 2 help her I msgd her the following:- ( the numbered ones are my msgs nd in between r my comments )
1.“ If girls wear mini skirts, they look sexy..How wil it look like, if boys wear the same ??? Answer :it will look like a CHURCHBELL !!! I noe it’s a Pathetic Joke bt it makes Toothy Stuart Little smile nd say “stupid” abhi apna mood aur dimag theek karle..mood theek karna is as simple as zapak mail…1 2 4 :-)
moral of the msg-ur problems may seem very big 2 u bt jus think abt d 4 yr old gal at d red light in d scorching sun bare feet on d road ”

( I msgd her tryin 2 help her nd make her feel better bt I soon went overboard nd let out all I had in mind !!! )

2.“nd the tsunami victims in d rehab camps even aftr so many yrs..ppl who lost ol dere families nd wealth nd don’t have ANYONE by dere side..nd think of dose ppl in sum remote village who mortgage their land( for JUST Rs. 60,000 as we say) to send their only child 2 fiitjee nd narayana so dat dey can compete for sum 4000 seats. Nd dose disabled nd blind teenagers who neva went 2 PVR Cinemas wid ny frnd..dere r millions f such ppl nd dey still live wid a ur prob stil so big ??:-) ”

Then she replied: “are u tryin 2 help me or make me feel worse !!!”
Bt I was busy writing her a msg(continuation of a above) nd I didn’t read her reply then !!! poor thing [:P]

3.“ we olwayz complain abt things we don’t hav bt neva value d things we hav..u noe ppl in d 3rd africa nd d othr parts of the world would kill for a life dat we guys lead….bt we guys r 2 busy sulkin over petty things 2 realise dis..wht um tryin 2 say is dat treasure ur life nd njoy every moment of it..dont waste ur life jus “dimaag kharab” karke….advice-instead of havin a 5star urself..giv it 2 sum poor bare footed 4 yr old gal at d redlight u’l ”

Then she replied again “Stop it !! um nt sulkin over petty things..nd I don’t need ny1 ryte now…I’ll b fine by myself..bye nd don’t reply..”
Bt I had by den already msgd her d following(continuation of d above msg)…nd I read her reply much l8r..

4.“ feel better abt urself..dat smile on her face is so dat moment ol ur problems vanish..dey ol feel so small nd petty..if dese guys cn face life wid a smile y cant we..nd if u don’t liv ur life well nd use ol d opportunities 2 b happy u’ll not only b wronging urself bt u’ll b wronging dese guys as well…may God b wid u..God bless all..liv well nd olwayz b happy :-) ”

And it was only aftr I’d msgd her all I wanted to that I read her replies.
After reading her replies initially I was mad at her and was disgusted wid her 4 sulkin over petty things but soon enuf I realized dat I was not disgusted wid her-I was disgusted wid myself !!! ( nd ol dose ppl cryin over petty things…excluding dis frnd …she gets upset rarely nd dis was one such occasion…poor thing…nd yeah l8r I called her nd made her HAPPY…OK !!!). Many of my frndz (including me) are olwayz cryin abt small things….domestic problems, lost love, frndz betrayin us…nd othr stuff…I noe dese r not very small problems…bt if we cant help it …its no use jus wasting our entire life cryin abt it…Of course its very normal nd correct to b sad abt it…nd let it out…but some ppl cry abt it ALL THE TIME !!! They have jus lost HOPE !!! Like d worldz come 2 an end !!!

This one day made me realize dat life is much bigger than our problems nd we shud rejoice every moment of it…nd try 2 help dose who r really in a state of destitute…dose widout hope…trust me dese small bt selfless deeds make u feel much much better abt urself !!!
Instead of going 2 Hooka nd burning ur lungs nd money away (um nt sayin don’t go dere at all OK bt reduce it)..if we spare some time nd money for dose kidz in an orphanage it’ll be much better..(Vasant Kunj fellowz dere is an orphanage near Aadyant play skool )
Um not askin u 2 stop leadin a life of luxury ……jus dat if u can do whateva minimal for the needy den the world will definitely b a much better place.. nd wheneva ur down nd low nd u feel u hav ol d problems in d world…think abt dese ppl…nd ask urself…r my problems still so big ???